When a "connection" helps you choose your right "NO"
Today I spent a lot of time doing something I love: connect to people. Even some that I do not know well. This is now professionally called "networking" and it is everywhere.
Thinking about the meaning of the term "networking", something came to mind: the word "Connection" - in my language, Italian, this word has a meaning that in English would be translated into "pulling some strings", to your own favour and advantage. This is exactly something that, if not genuine, I highly recommend to stay away from and to say NO to
People think that because they know somebody, the doors to a particular paradise universe are going to open. I would add to that: "Only if your network and your contacts are genuine". Why being in touch with people we do not like, only because we can GET something? Just don't do that. It is another way to invest time in the wrong things. When we are not able to say NO to these "unhealthy" connections, we trigger a reaction, and things which are not healthy will naturally come to us.
We actually want the opposite. We need to be in a community where there is MUTUAL trust. Without this kind of trust and genuine cooperation, the doors that open will not match with your life purpose and expectations, and your values will start being messed up, like a contagious disease: the connection disease.
When somebody you do not appreciate or trust come to you with a "seductive" proposal (a good job that entails working 14 hours per day.. but it is good.. or a cooperation that will absolutely STEAL your time and give you nothing in return.. but maybe it will help you on the long run), ask yourself the following "coaching" questions:
- Is this cooperation worth my time, effort and dedication?
- Is this person someone I genuinely trust and admire?
- What are my priorities towards this particular topic right now?
- Do I want to spend more time with other people, who might not have the same "connections", but make me feel worthy and eventually could give me the energy to carry on?
- Am I connecting to certain people in order to escape the truth about myself? THIS IS A GOOD ONE! Remember. Sometimes people who give us compliments only for the seek of getting something in return from us, actually might not be the ones to listen to!
CONNECT GENUINELY! :)