No New Year's Resolutions.. Just goal settings!
In the past, I had tried several times to write down New Year's Resolutions. They never worked. I give you an example of one of those I wrote 4 years ago:
- More sports
- Write more on my diary
- Apply for more jobs
I mean there is nothing wrong with those 3 wishes, but they all stressed one important thing, that I was focusing really a lot on: LACKING and ABSENCE. Usually new year's resolutions come to you at a time like today, December 31st, when you are thinking what to wear for tonight's party, or you are thinking: "OK, this is the last day of the year that I can focus on all the crap I have done, and what I haven't done!! Next year will be better". The problem is that this kind of focus is again negative and focuses on what is missing.
Why don't we start re-focusing and see what we have accomplished for the year 2018 that is leaving us? And also, why don't we set GOALS instead of resolutions, and very very specific ones. When I work with my clients and I coach them, the best moments of clarity arrive when I keep asking "Can you narrow the problem down even more?", or "What is that you really want?", or "can you be more specific? What is authority to you? What is passion to you?" Because those are the moments when you really dig on what is behind a wish like "more sports" or " a better job".
Shall we give it a try? SURE! Let's rephrase those past goals into very specific ones, and I want to make them more current too!!
- I want to practice aqua jogging in 2019 once a week and I want to swim too, once a week. 2 times per week of water sports and another time dancing salsa. I want to do it because I want to recover from my leg problem (leg hurting a lot in the last year, for a posture problem I have) and my health is priority number one of 2019.
- I want to write blogs every Monday, for my clients, and journaling whenever I feel like. And always on paper.
- I want to start working with more companies and coach their employees. The goal is to work at least with one international company in Zurich. Two times per month.
You see? I set a goal with a specific value in mind and with details on how I want it to be. Now, the next action will be to set mini-goals and actions towards these 3 things. And again, they are just 3 goals, but there is so much to do already for them to become true. So, here is another tip: DO NOT MAKE AN UNREALISTING SUPER LONG LIST! It will just add pressure on you, and you have already enough pressure. Be compassionate towards yourself, and just write down 3-4 goals.
The other thing I am going to do right now, and I suggest you do it too, is to dedicate at least 1 page to write down your 2018 achievements. Seeing them in front of you is the most amazing thing, because they are REAL! and it is a self-reminder that what you have done is good enough :)
And...most importantly: do not let anything or anyone tell you that you cannot do that. Or try to sabotage them unconsciously.. meaning, you will have to say a few NO's from time to time, if things are in the way of accomplishing these goals. But that is OK! Remember, we cannot please everyone!
I believe so much in you!! HAPPY NEW YEAR :) :)